Even as a #Prolife Activist, birthdays ain't my thing.

I'll clarify: I don't celebrate my birthday. Ever.

"But you are a prolifer," you're thinking. Yes, I am, probably the most obnoxious and out loud one you'll find. And it's not an 'age' thing or anything like that. It's that I was privileged TO be born while millions and millions have not.

My husband and I have literally fought over this. He wants to celebrate my birth with all the pomp and circumstance he can muster. He's the best guy ever. He is so precious to me.

Maybe I'm wrong. It's not a martyr thing, I assure you. I don't like attention. I don't like making a day 'mine', I hate that even on this day, the anniversary of my birth, over 3500 babies will lose their lives and never have their birthdays. Ever.

I wish I could explain this better. But just know that I thank God every day for my great health and the many blessings He has given me, despite my occasional disobedience. I thank God that He gave ME His only Son to save me from an eternal HELL.

Seriously, what more could I possibly want or need? I'd rather see that all unborn children be given the chance to have their first birthday; a life with a plan known to God and peace. Especially peace.

Even so, Joy Comes in the Mourning.

I went to an Infant Loss Memorial recently. It's for the loss of children through miscarriage, abortion, perinatal, SIDS, etc. It was a beautiful ceremony, Christ-centered, tactful, loving, and safe. It was a good place to mourn our children, to have fellowship with other moms, to tell stories, share testimonies, offer hope.

During the memorial, we were offered a candle to light for our children, to offer them to God if they had not yet done so. I remember thinking there isn't enough candles for my losses, my children. Yes, it's symbolic. Some people need that, the ceremony. And tragically, some parents have not 'offered' their child to the Lord. It's truly a process just for the parents because God has already accepted them. But we need to know He is with them, we need that comfort.

I was victimized by abortion and suffered miscarriages. Women told stories of their children and loss. It was wonderful to see married couples there because sometimes husbands don't want to face the loss or doesn't believe there really was a loss. To some, people just die. For others, there just isn't enough candles.

"For if we believe that Jesus died and rose again, even so them also which sleep in Jesus will God bring with Him." ~ 1Thessalonians 4:14

While I have loss, and it was tragic, others walk a harder walk: "...while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us," [Rom 5:8]. Us...each and every one of US.

I thank God my hope is in Jesus, because sometimes...there just isn't enough candles.

The Pastor's Desk | The Duggars, Liberal Hypocrisy, Sin & Repentance

Is the Duggar situation an isolated issue that has never happened to other families OR is everyone piling on the Duggars just because they are Christians? After seeing the videos, Michelle and Jim Bob did much more than the average parent does in situations like this. They really went the extra mile because they knew this would affect the adult Josh and their girls would be someday.

Josh was homeschooled, essentially isolated from the world and still Satan sought him out to do this despicable thing. Do you think for one minute that all children left alone in bedrooms, playhouses, or basements haven't at least thought of sexual exploration? Agreed, not all children do these things but it only takes one, once.

There are many things to address. First, this is a 'celebrity' Christian family that has protected their children FROM the world and never said one time that they are perfect and without sin. Second, these incidents were addressed and action taken where in most families, that does NOT happen. Third, because of their relationship with Jesus Christ, everyone involved understood true forgiveness of sin and repentance. Fourth, because God is a forgiving God who gives us a myriad of second chances, only the world would judge what God has already forgiven. It is never up to any individual to second guess what God has already taken care of.

The liberals who are judging the Duggars are no different than the religious who put Jesus Christ on a Cross to die PUBLICLY. They forget that their darling Lena Dunham did great harm to her own baby sister, wrote about it, spoke about it; Dunham is the darling of the Liberal Left? Just how huge is that LOG in your eye?

Why sexual sin? Satan does NOT make children believe they should....rob banks, for instance. Since God hates sexual sin outside of  the  covenant of traditional marriage. Satan uses sex to tear families and marriages apart. Satan uses sex to make people believe they are the wrong sex. Satan uses sex to twist a person's mind to believe they are homosexual. Satan uses sex to make men and women predators. Satan uses sex to open a young child's eyes to 'exploration', and in many instances, some parents do not discourage it calling it 'normal'. There is NOTHING normal about a child exploring anything sexual or an adult saying it's okay.

Coming from a Pastor's perspective, I think it's very interesting that Satan attacked the eldest son. If you are a follower of Jesus Christ and read the Bible, you know that the oldest son has a 'birthright'. In the Bible, Satan knows this and uses the oldest son to plague the family; for example the story or Jacob and Esau. Josh Duggar is the oldest son of the Duggar family who was following in his father's footsteps from business, family and Christian perspectives.

Children are coerced by other children, television, and the internet to inappropriately touch each other because of 'curiosity'. Sex is OUT LOUD in the world today, can you imagine what it's like for the average child that is NOT protected from the world? Every minute of every day kids are bombarded with sex in everything, from music to movies to friends to school. Have you looked at the clothes designed for girls under 5? Swimsuits? It's as if our girls are being set up to fail before they set foot in school for the very first time.

Looking inward: How dare ANYONE say anything about another's sin when they don't look at their own? Are YOU without sin? Then the question is, how long must a person be the accused for YOU to be satisfied?

Jesus said 'Go and sin no more' to the woman CAUGHT IN THE VERY ACT of adultery. We agree that what happened in the Duggar household was detestable, obviously. But like it or not, it's forgivable. God does not define Josh Duggar as a predator, He sees him as forgiven and repentant. If you do not or will not, then you need a little talk with Jesus.

Is Bullying the New Black?

Hate is a strong word, why are we forced to use it so much? We are so sanctimonious and smug as humans, constantly we drone on about me me me. Sometimes I think it's because we are tying to protect ourselves, other times it is to replenish what another has taken away so barbarically.

All this talk about bullying in the world today, is this the new 'hate' word?

Bullying has been around way longer than the agendas that rely on it today. It's not a victimless crime, it does not go without grief.

When I was a kid, I had the audacity to be too skinny, too tall, too pale, too brown headed which of course meant that I had to be the target of every bully at every school for any reason. Every day I dealt with it. I wasn't black/asian/hispanic, I wasn't gay...then how in the world could I have had the gall to be bullied when the protected classes weren't? Interesting. Every day I was called names. Every day I was told I was getting beaten up. Every day I walked home in total fear. Every day I wanted to die for the crime of being bullied. EVERY. DAY.

Hated. Plain and simple, I was hated for not being something else. And I had no special interest groups to protect me, I had no government offices or Senators willing to take my case to the Supreme Court; in fact the ACLU had absolutely no interest in my case. Why? Because of my so-called 'white privilege' which somehow miraculously gave me assumed protection that I never had. What a LIE. This is why I don't buy into protecting only certain kids from being bullied at schools; no one can hide. I've made that crystal clear. Schools today are training teachers and counselors to look past bullied kids like me and be like body armor to minority kids and gay kids.

So much for so-called 'white privilege'. Recently, most of the kids that have committed suicide for being bullied are average white kids. These days, I can't fathom how horrific it is with social media. Now everything is in real time, just a click away. Destroy someone's life...because you can.

The Bible says hate is akin to murder [1John 3:15]. In the hearts of bullies, I was murdered for the crime of being NOT them. When I was being bullied back then, I cried. Today, I PRAY. It's easy to hate back, but not wise or Godly. The hard thing to do is give them the other cheek [Matt 5:39].

Ultimately we all have to answer to God for what we have done or NOT done. Life is about pressing on, dying well, knowing eternity is really forever, and at least trying to make things better so others will try to love FIRST.

If you are being bullied, remember that GOD LOVE YOU! And tell someone! And if they don't do anything, TELL SOMEONE ELSE. And keep telling until it stops.

HEY! Who's the Parent Around Here??? The Answer is Not What You Think.

What are we teaching our kids? What are we teaching our ADULT kids? Have you made a public profession of continuing to be their parent OR do you think they really aren't paying attention?

Sounds weird, eh? Yeah, I know. But hear me out.

Parents preach what they want from kids but do they actually DO rather than just preach? I've often thought that being a parent is like being a Pastor of a church...or is it the other way around, I wonder. Anyway, God gives us these wonderful little people to love and teach so that they can do the same for their children. Instead, kids react to what they SEE rather than HEAR.

Jesus told us to get the LOG out of our own eye before we can tell our brother to get the speck out if his [Matt 7:3-5]. Excellent advice, I'd say. But few take it.

Then, are parents just a spring of advice or are they doers? Obviously, we should be both. Before I came to Christ many years ago and a parent, I preached all kids of stuff to the kids without backing it up. Most parents do. We see the freight train coming, we feel the storm about to erupt, WE KNOW. But what kids remember is quite a bit different of us parents trying to keep them out of a busy street with cars speeding toward them.

After I became a Christian, ALL of these things became crystal clear. I spoke it, didn't do it, and neither did my kids....then or now. So, I had to get my credibility back as their parent and keep it as a Christian. After all, God is who I have to answer to, ultimately.

When our adult kids do dumb stuff, bad things, or get caught up in another's web, they come out swinging remembering what they thought was 'cool dad' or 'fun mom' instead of the real deal life issues we tried to tackle when they were little. I guess what I'm trying to say is that parents will get the blunt end of everything, we have to persevere, the kids have to redirect their pain and suffering, and in the meantime we have to not be hurt by their disparity or disinterest or disbelief in us. The blame game is getting very old.  

Life isn't Nintendo. Remember when a Nintendo game made everything better? Ahhhh the 80's; no smartphones, no computers, no tablets, NO SOCIAL MEDIA! But even back then we left them in front of that game like some kind of cheap babysitter hoping for 'the best'. It made them happy then, but the 'best' came and went and left one heck of a mess.

Just like you and everyone else, I am still parenting adult kids - but this time I'm doing it with the help of God, trusting God, and showing them the love OF God for themselves and their lives.

God is really is the only way to having successful adult kids so they can have their own extraordinary families.

The Parent Ship in the Storm When LIFE Happens

As a Christian and a parent, I have learned to trust God with the big stuff, and not so big stuff. I don't nag, but I will answer a question as I feel God would want me to and back it up with love and kindness. My opinion may not be popular, but then again, I am their parent first.

I'm a results person. In other words, we are HERE now [like those maps in amusement parks say] and after going through getting HERE, only results matter. The way HERE was tumultuous and contrary to my better judgement for them, made me lose sleep, prayed and prayed - and I'm sure that the way HERE made me a special kind of insane. So the fact that I'll have a Godly answer is kind of impressive, especially since I feel like I've aged about 100 years over it.

Complaining now is not only counterproductive, but makes the situation take two steps back when we need a miracle; and miracles only go forward.

Having adult kids is HARD. Did I say it was HARD?? After taking one of my adult kids to the doctor recently, I got this revelation that I'm just his ride there. In other words, the doctor has no legal reason to tell me anything about his appointment. I just sat there quite befuddled and a little hurt. The kids are adults, have children of their own. What's a mom of adults kids to do in these situations? I'll let you know when I find out ;)

God has made a way with us to take care of our adult kids for prolonged periods of time to nurture, mend, love, and just plain help when life gets really HARD. A recent article said that 1 in 6 adults have moved back 'home'. I think it's much more than that. This world had made it very hard for kids to be on their own today. Rent is astronomical, pay is getting lower and lower, student debt is insane, good jobs are sparse, and if they are single parents, quadruple the hardship...at least.

And even though God has made a way for us to be that blessing - the ship in the storm - it may not be so to kids who won't let us. We nearly bought a house to do this, just to be told no at the very last minute. Or they leave too early and unprepared and find themselves broke or homeless, or both AGAIN. They always need money yesterday, no one plans for anything, so when I'm left holding the bag I usually don't have much to work with. I have to start over for them, get back to the basics of life.

I just wish that they wouldn't let it get so bad that it gets this HARD.

Sometimes, that horse won't drink no matter how you try. So, what's a parent to do? TRUST GOD. KEEP TRUSTING GOD. DID I MENTION TO TRUST GOD?

Oh, and keep a light on. You never know when the phone or doorbell will ring.

A Mom is a Mom FOREVER.

Even when they are adults, on their own, we still fret and want to fix whatever is wrong. I'm a mom to a man who has a child of his own...but still his mom. And I want to fix it for him.

It's not about smothering, it's about knowing the path he's about to take and I want to keep him from harm. Is that so wrong? Of course not. I've been fighting for him since I found out I was pregnant over 30 years ago. After losing a child to a coerced abortion in the 70's, I fought for him. You see, my mother tried to force me to abort again and this time, I SAID NO. Even though I had NO plan, NO resources, NO help. I fought anyway.

And I'm still fighting for him, and I will until either my last breath or his. Only death can separate us.

When I see him hurting, I hurt for him even if his choices weren't so good. He's my kid, my son...my baby.

After having him for a few weeks to help him get back on his feet, I know I have to give him back. I don't want to. I hate doing it. I want to stand between him and life on the other side of my front door to shield him. But I know I have to give him back...right into the hands of what hurt him.

I have to trust God with every step he's taken in his life and in his future. God wants him to be victorious, not to fail, and glorify Him in the process. I know this. I mean, I REALLY KNOW THIS. But it does't make it any easier to let him go.

My son was a crisis pregnancy that did not succumb to an abortion. He was meant to be here, he was known to God before the very foundation of the world, and He gave him to me.

God gave me this incredible kid because even in His infinite wisdom, even though He created the entire world and universe, EVEN THOUGH He is GOD, He trusted ME....ME....to entrust this incredible life to birth, to love, to instruct, to be there in the worst of it, no matter what.

God trusted ME. I am forever grateful to a Holy God that would look at a mess like me and determine I am good enough to raise a child I was blessed with regardless of the circumstances.

There are no orphans of God. And not one of us are fatherless because we have a Father in Heaven who watches over....even me.